Wittman meets girls und panzer
by MachinegunM4aniac
Summary: Micheal Wittmann and his crew are transported tp the universe of girls und panzer. The reveared tiger commander will learn new things inthis universe as he tries to get back to his universe
1. Chapter 1

1944, Belgium. Micheal Wittmann of the Waffen SS, panzer division. Being the commander of the 101st Heavy panzer division, led to many to idolize him. Michael has already risen up to the rank of SS-Hauptsturmführer, and being a tank ace. He was the recipient of the Knights Cross of the Iron Cross with Oak Leaves, Swords and Diamonds. But nothing could prepare him for what will happen next.

"Hans what's taking you so long?" Wittmann said to a group of bushes.

"Well I'm sorry sir but my stomach is not taking that sauerkraut nicely." a voice replied from behind the bushes.

A few seconds later a series of farts is heard followed by screams of pain.

"Oh god, whose got the shits now?" a man said popping his head out of the tank.

"Hans has it." Wittmann replied.

"Great, first Karl now Hans." the man replied back.

After 30 minutes Hans finally got the sauerkraut out of his system and the group was heading home. On their way, they had to go through a forest. As they drove down the path, the sunset turned into a sunrise.

"Halt, I think we are lost." Wittmann said.

Popping the hatch open, he pulled out his binoculars, and scanned the opening. It was a well mowed meadow, very lush in green and seemed to stretch endlessly. Then he saw what looked like a school, a perfectly intact school.

"What the hell?" Wittmann said to himself.

Then he noticed a yard with a fence around it. It had parked tanks of different nationalities. The ones that cuaght his eyes were the American M3 Lee and a Stug III. The Lee was painted pink. Why the hell would anyone paint their tank pink? Gays maybe? The Stug was painted different colors like red and yellow, and had banners sticking up behind the crew compartment. Then he heard the bell ring, and girls wearing uniforms exited the school.

"Hans, take us to the school. Lets see if the locals can help us." Wittmann said.

The tank lurched forward and then began to move. As it came out of the forest the tank sped its way to the school. The girls that wee still lingering around looked at the on coming tank in shock. Miho caught a glimpse of the Tiger tank, seeing the German cross on the turret and side. And she saw the tank's number; 007. The commander was looking at her as it sped by, confusion on his face. He was young, thirty maybe. The tanks stopped at the steps of the school, Wittmann getting out to meet a man in 60's rushing down the steps.

"What in the blazes? Who the hell are you people?" the man asked.

"Guten Tag Herr, Ich suche nach einem Weg nach Villers-Bocage. Wissen Sie wo es ist? Wittmann asked.

The man looked confused, obviously the language barrier is going to cause some problems. Then a girl around 17 walked up.

"Sir he's speaking German, let me help." the girl said.

"Hallo, Herr. Ich heißt Kate. Wer bist du?" the girl asked.

"Ah Ich es tut mer leid." Wittmann said.

"I'am SS-Hauptsturmführer Michael Wittmann. 101st heavy Panzer Division. And I would like to know where Villers-Bocage is." Wittmann said in English.

"Well Mr. Wittmann, you are not in France, your on a Carrier." The girl replied.

"What no I'm not.'' Wittmann said.

"It's true your on a carrier, do you not see that smoke stack?" the man said to Wittmann.

"Okay, seriously where the hell am I?" Wittmann asked.

"Your're at Ooarai High school for girls." the man said.

"OOOKay, what's with the hideous paint schemes? I mean who would paint a tank pink?" Wittmann asked.

"Oh that's our school's Tankery class team. You've got the Angler fish, Hippo, Duck, Rabbit, Anteater, Mallard, and Leopon." the girl replied.

Wittmann looked dumbfounded. What kind of schools is this. Who teaches girls how to drive tanks?

"Listen, Kate is it?, um what purpose is there to teach girls how to operate a tank?'' Wittmann asked.

"Just for tournaments, it's like an elective class." Kate replied.

"Speaking of which, here comes Miho, she lead us to win the tournament last year."

The girl walked up to Wittmann, slapping him in the face.

"That's for almost running me over!" Miho said.

"Miho chill, you just slapped a legendary tank commander. Meet SS-Hauptsturmführer Michael Wittmann." Kate said.

"So you have heard of me." Wittmann sai

"Who wouldn't your in the history books. You and three other Tigers held the left flank, during the battle of Kursk." Kate said.

"Yes I remember, that was months before I was transfer to France." Wittmann replied.

"So Where's the rest of your crew?" Miho asked, now curious.

"Hold on. Jan, Karl, Hans, Fritz; get out of there." Wittmann said.

Soon the hatches on the tank opens, The driver had a dirty face, the bow gunner looked quite young, maybe twenty the two men who poke their heads out at the top of the turret looked older than Wittmann did. They all clambered out and walked up.

"Guys stellen sich vor." Wittmann said to the group.

"Ich heißt Jan, Der Lader." Jan said.

"Ich Hans, der Fahrer." Hans said.

"Fritz, Der Schießer." Fritz said.

"I-Ich Karl, Der Funker." Karl said hesitantly.

"He's a new member, hasn't experienced his first battle yet." Wittmann said.

The other three laughed, pattong Karl on the back.

"Anyways it's getting close to dark, do you have a place for us to stay?" Wittmann asked.

"There's a barn over there you guys can crash there for the night." the man said.

"Thanks, see you in the moring." Wittmann said.

In the barn...

"Alright you guys, start making yourself at home cuz it's going to be awhile before we get back to our timeline." Wittmann said stretching.

Soon the men had their stuff laid out and they fell fast asleep.


	2. A Little Contest

"Alright rise and shin men," Wittmann said as he stared at the sunrise.

"Mmhm... Herr hauptsturmfuhrer why." Karl mumble.

Wittman kicked Karl

"Get up." he said.

"Yes Hauptsturmfuhrer." Karl replied more alert.

After getting ready, the group walked towards the garage where the tiger was located. A girl with shoulder length hair looled over immediately noticing Wittmann.

"Oh my gosh it can't be him!" she screamed trying to hide her excitement.

"Was?" Wittman said.(What?)

The girl ran over to him nearly jumping up and down.

"Oh my god oh my god oh my god it is you." she said.

"What?" Wittman said again.

"Your're Michael Wittmann, of of the best tank commanders in history." she replied.

"Yes and who are you fan girl." he asked.

"Name's Akiyama and- Hey! Did you call me a fan girl?" she replied.

"Yes I did." Wittmann said.

"Who's the cutie over there?" Akiyama said looking over at Karl.

Karl noticed the girl and nearly fell over. Holy crap she was cute!

"I-I-Ich bin K-Karl." he said nervously, face flushed red. (I'm Karl.)

"What did he say?" Akiyama asked.

"His name's Karl." Wittmann said.

Wittmann turned to the group, clearing his throat.

"Ladies, how are you today?" he asked.

"Good sir." they replied

"Alright let's have some fun." Wittmann said.

"Today I'm going to give you the chance to fight me in a mock battle. If any of you should beat me, I will let you do what ever you want to me. Deal?" Wittmann said.

"Deal!" the group said.

"Let's get going then, each of you have a 5 minute head start. Now let's play battle of the wits." Wittmann said.

The girls got into their tanks, and drove off in different directions. While Wittmann and his crew got a spare tank prepped.

"Alright guys, how should we do this?" Anzu asked.

"This guy is good, we need to come up with a plan on how to beat him." Erwin said.

"Miho got any ideas?" Noriko asked.

Meanwhile...

"Karl, Hans, Janik, Fritz. Get in." Wittmann said.

The experienced crew got into a Panzer IV Ausf J. Hans started up the engine and soon they were on their way.

Miho was hidden in a thick group of bushes, waiting to see if Wittmann will show up. Still no sign.

Though Miho could not see them, Wittmann could.

"Hauptsturmfuhrer, shell is loaded." Jan said.

"Hold fire, I want that stug." Wittmann said.

"What about the Hetzer?" Fritz asked.

"That one's next. Now if I were a Stug, where would I be?" Wittmann asked.

"There's a series of small hills just pass the field there. I would bet they're there." Hans said.

"Right, the hills have the perfect set up for an ambush, so there's got to be a bait. " Wittmann said.

Wittmann pondered for a few seconds. His eyes lit up.

"I've got it, Karl can you drive?" Wittmann asked.

"Ja Hauptsturmfuhrer. Took driving instructions in a tank before joining up with you." Karl replied.

"Good I've got a plan." Wittmann said.

Meanwhile...

"Ugh, Where is that strange man?" Caesar asked.

Erwin shrugged

"Who knows where?" Erwin replied.

"Wait I see Duck team." Kiyomi said.

"Where?" Erwin asked looking through her scope.

"Being followed by that Tiger. But it's not shooting." Kiyomi replied.

"Who cares, shoot it." Erwin said.

As the Stug was getting ready to fire, Hans carefully crept the tank behind the Stug point blank range.

"Get ready to fire." Wittmann said.

"Fire!"Erwin screamed.

The stug jolted back, only to get jolted forward from Wittmans shot. The shell that Erwin fired bounce off the Tiger. Erwin' s tank was out of the contest. Wittmann popped his head out and looked at an upset Erwin.

"Better luck next time Madchen." Wittmann said.

They quickly dispatched Duck team's tank and moved on to find the panzer iv the pink m3 and Hetzer.

"Alright Karl, get back here." Jan said through the radio.

Karl hid the tiger and got back in.

"Miho, we're out Erwin said."

"What about duck team?" Miho asked.

"Yea they're out too." Erwin replied

"Wow this guy is good." Miho said.

"Well of course he's frickin Michael Wittmann." Akiyama said.

Thier radio crackled.

"Frau Miho, your're the only one left, I've already took out your other Freunden. I wish the best of luck to you Frau."

The group was left in shock.

"Ok let me scratch that. He's pretty damn good." Akiyama.

"My question is how did he get our radio frequency?" Hana asked.

Meanwhile...

Wittmann passes the disabled M3 waving to the girls.

"These girls are creative, but not that creative." Wittman said.

Miho was now rushing to the scene of the ambush Wittmann had dismantled. The crew of the stug were sitting outside talkong about history while the crew of the I-go were practicing volleyball.

"Where'd he go?" Miho asked.

"He went south east." Erwin replied.

"Thank you." Miho replied.

"Your welcome, kick his butt for me." Erwin said.

"I will." Miho replied.

After driving for several minutes Miho came upon the disabled Hetzer, and M3 lee.

"Keep going Miho you can do it!" the student body president said.

Wittmann grinned .

"Perfect. Jan, load a armor piercing shell."

"Jawohl Herr Hauptsturmfuhrer." Jan replied. (yes sir)

"Fritz, target is the Panzer, 400 meters out 17 Degrees up." Wittmann said.

"On target!" Fritz yelled.

"Feuer!" Wittmann yelled.

Fritz pulled the trigger, the shell, hit the track of Miho's Panzer. It spun, giving a cler shot to Wittmann on the weak point.

"Shell loaded hauptsturmfuhrer." Jan said.

"Firtz same yardage, 2 degrees up."

"On Target!" Fritz yelled.

"Shell loaded Miho!" Akiyama yelled.

"Hana, target 400 hundred meters 22 degrees up." Miho said.

"Feuer!" Wittman said.

"Fire!" Miho screamed.

Both tanks fired, but who scored the killing blow? Who won this little contest? Miho or Wittmann Find out next chapter!


	3. Multiverse theory (near end of chapter)

Both shells hit each other, bringing up a cloud of dust. When the dust disappear, both tanks had the white flag up. Wittmann opened his hatch, Miho doing the same.

"That was very good, now lets get back to the garage." Wittmann said.

Back at the garage...

"I know it was completely random for you girls to fight me, and I apologize. But that is what happens. Always expect the unexpected." Wittmann said.

"Frau Erwin, always be alert. Especially in the StuG. It's got good front armor, but the rear is weak. And turn your engine off if you planned to stay awhile." Wittmann continued.

"I'll show that snob nose kraut.." Erwin mumbled.

"And Miho, that trap you created was creative, but think a little more out of the box. When your faced with a challenge, try to put your self in your enemy's mind. Ask questions like, 'If I was him/her what would I do ?' " Wittmann continued.

"The others need a little bit more work on coordination." Wittmann finished.

Erwin raised her hand.

"Yes?" Wittmann asked.

"How'd do you know so much about the StuG?" Erwin asked.

"Back in 1941, I took part in Operation Barbarossa, The Fuhrer's invasion of Russia. I joined the 1st SS Leibstandarte SS Adolf Hitler. I commanded a StuG, and I took out four T-34's. I should know how to work the StuG." Wittmann replied.

"Here, it's an autograph of both Field marshal Rommel and Heinz Guderian." Wittmann said, holding the pictures to Erwin.

Erwin squealed with joy, only to have Akiyama trying to grab it.

"Can I please have one?" Akiyama asked.

"No! They're mine." Erwin said.

Miho giggled.

"So Mr. Wittmann, what your saying is we need a little more practice?" Miho asked.

"Yes, if you want to win your second tournament." Wittmann replied.

"How'd you know about the tournament?" Miho asked

"The banners behind you." Wittmann replied.

Miho turned around and saw the banners.

"Oh." Miho said.

"So let's see what your have for tanks." Wittmann said.

Wittmann stood in front of the line of tanks.

"Ok two panzers, a type 89, Hetzer, M3 Lee, The prototype Porsche Tiger, type 3 Chi nu , StuG, Char bis-1, a Panther, a Jagdpanther, Jagdtiger, and finally my Tiger." Wittmann said.

"That's all of them." Miho replied.

Meanwhile...

Karl was sitting by himself, looking at the sky. His lunch only consisting of a piece of sausage, and cracker. Man he wished he had some chocolate. He took a bite of his sausage, humming Panzerlied to himself.

"Whether it storms or snows, or the sun laugh at us, The day burning hot, or ice cold the night, Dusty are the faces, but glad is our sense, yes, our sense, Our tank rages there in the stormwind [of the assault]." Akiyama sang to the tune.

"Ah Sie kennen unser Lied Panzelied." Karl said. (ah you know our song Panzerlied.)

"Not sure what you said, but yes I know Panzerlied." Akiyama said.

She sat down next to Karl, Karl trying not to act shy.

"Your blushing." Akiyama said.

Karl said nothing, his face red. Akiyama giggled, then put her hand on his.

Meanwhile..

Fritz hans and jan were smoking cigarettes away from the girls and tanks. Jan was displaying some signs of ptsd. Every few seconds his hand trembled.

"Wittmann still thinks this us a dream?" Fritz asked.

"Yup its like he randomly accepted it too quick." Hans replied.

"What the hell was going on in his brain, to just randomly start a battle?" Jan said.

Fritz looked over and saw Karl holding hands with the girl who had short brown hair.

"Cute, looks like we got a couple love birds." Fritz said as he took a drag from his cigarette.

"Hauptsturmfuhrer, Kommen heir!" Jan yelled.

Wittmann looked and saw jan motioning him. He ran over.

"What do you want?" Wittmann asked.

"Sir, think about thus hard. It didnt hit you that we were in the Arddennes headed to Villars-Bocage, and now we are on a ship in the middle of the ocean?"

"Jan relax, its just a dream." Wittmann replied.

"Okay what year is it?" Fritz asked.

"1944." Wittmann replied.

"Well according to that calendar over there it is May 15th 2012" Fritz said.

"Ok. I'm following." Wittmann replied.

"So if it's supposed to be 1944, then why the hell are we in 2012, on a carrier with a school on it that has high school girls driving tanks?" Fritz asked.

"Ok, now you've intrigued me." Wittmann said.

"Sir there's no other way to explain what happended to us, but that we went into the future somehow." Fritz finished.

Wittmann ponder about the explanation and then mentally kicked himself for being so stupid.

"Shit. How are we going to get back to our timeline?" Wittmann asked.

The three others shrugged.

"Well find a way back." Wittmann said before walking back to the tanks.

Miho was finishung a list when she saw the concern face of Wittmann.

"Everything alright Mr. Wittmann," she asked.

"No Im not." Wittmann replied.

"You realized this wasn't a dream didn't you?" Miho asked.

"Yes I did." Wittmann replied.

"Multi verse theory." Miho said.

"Multi what?" Wittmann asked

"Multi verse theory is a theory that there are multiple universes that co exist with each other. Time space laws of gravity etc. Mostly popularized with time travel. It's a very controversial subject." Miho asked.

"How do you know this?" Wittmann asked.

"This is a high school the main subjects of Math, Science, and English are tuaght everywhere." Miho replied.

Later that evening...

"She called it what?" Hans asked.

"She called it multiverse theory." Wittmann replied.

"Whats that?" Jan asked.

Wittman pick up a shell cassing.

"Alright lets say this is our universe, now inside this universe is a bunch of other universes. In one universe theres no war in the next only men are on the planet. So along the way as we drove through the forrest we must 've broke some dimension that brought us to this universe, which also happened to take us into the future and now we are on ship with girls who drive tanks. ." Wittmann said.

"What ate you talking about?" Hans asked.

"I have no idea." Wittmann replied.

* * *

A/N: in the first two chapters Wittmann thought all of it was a joke and a dream, which is why tgungs were fast paced. Its also why he acted recklessly. The shells are practice shells so no harm involved. When Wittmann is with his crew he is speaking German, when he's with the GuP characters, he speaking english. And when crew member like hans or fritz is speaking to one of GuP charcters they are speaking german. Which is why there us parenthesis as a translate of what the said characters are saying.


	4. Chapter 4

"Hallo, Hast du ein Klavier?" Jan asked Kate. (hi do you have a piano?)

"Ja, es ist die Halle auf der linken Seite." Kate replied. (it's right down the hall to the left.)

"Danke." Jan said. (Thanks)

Jan arrived at the piano and sat down. He took a breath and put his hands on the piano. He started to play Moonlight sonata. His hands gracefully the first movement of the song. The sound of the song traveling down the empty halls. What Jan didn't know was that a group of girls standing behind him. Jan then played the second movement, his hand eye coordination was amazing.

Fritz and Hans were working on the Porsche tiger, their hands black beyond recognition. The girls of the auto club helping. Hans attached chains to the engine, which will then be replaced by a custom made engine. The new engine will be more reliable than the one used originally. Hans used hand signals to direct the operation. He gave the thumbs up when the old engine was on the garage floor.

"Wow, he sure knows how to work on engines." one of the girls remarked.

Fritz looked at one of the power tools, obviously not knowing how it works. It took him awhile to understand what it was. They finally got the new engine in, Hans and the girls got into the tank. Hans turned the new engine over, being directed by Fritz, who used a variety of hand signals. The engine rumbled as the beast slowly crept out of the garage. Fritz then hop on the tank, sitting next to Hans hatch, holding onto the barrel. The new engine gave the tank a speed of 85 km/h or roughly 50 miles per hour on pavement. They also fitted a winch on the front in case of emergency. They also put on a new set of tracks that were less likely to dig into the ground and pop off.

Jan finished the song, still not noticing the girls behind him. One of them clapped, startling him.

"That was wonderful." One of them said.

Meanwhile...

"You have a what coming up?" Wittmann asked.

"We have a celebration match coming up against Pravda and St. Glorianas." Anzu said.

"Ok what's this have to do with me and my crew?" Wittmann asked.

"I like to invite you to come and watch, see how well we do." Anzu replied.

"Ok when is it?" Wittmann asked.

"Two weeks." Anzu replied.

While the others were doing their thing, Karl and Akiyama were having a make out session. ( not sex).

'Holy crap.' Karl thought to himself. Him a 17 year old who lied his way into the SS getting the best kisses he's ever had. He laugh to himself.

"I think I found my new bf." Akiyama said.

Meanwhile...

"Play this song." one of the girls asked, playing the hip hop tune. It took Jan a few seconds to start playing the tune perfectly.

"Ohh I got one." another girl said as she played a record.

"One, two, three o'clock four o'clock rock. Five,six, seven o'clock eight o'clock rock..." the song started.

"Its Bill Haley and the comets." the girl said.

In a few minutes Jan was playing the catchy tune, and it was creeping down the halls. The principal was in his office, tapping his foot to the catchy music, not noticing his movement.

Fritz and has arrived at the shooting range. fritz sat down int he gunners position, loading a shell before looking down the site

"560 meters out, left breeze 8 kph. So 18 degrees up and 360 meter ranged in." Fritz said.

Hans was sticking out of the commander hatch, with binoculars, so he can correct Fritz.

"Feuer!" Fritz said, and pulled the trigger.

Miho watched as the shell hit the steel target, shrapnel from the steel flying into the air.

"Good hit, now moving target." Hans said into the radio.

The Porsche tiger was moving quick along side a moving dummy target. Fritz spun the turret around, the gun was bouncing in the sight. Fritz calculated the motion of him and the target and pointed the gun a little bit ahead of the target. He fire, but the shell passed harmlessly over the the target.

"Shit, loading!" Fritz yelled getting another shell loaded.

Fritz fired a shell this time hitting the target.

"We got to fix the stabilization on this thing." Fritz said.

"No kidding, I was bouncing quite a bit." Hans replied.

"Lets bring her back to the garage." Fritz replied.

Hans turned the tank around and head back for the garage. Hans parked the vehicle in the garage, getting out and head towards the tools.

"What's the problem now?" one of the girls asked.

"Die Stabilisierung auf dieser Sache ist Scheiße" Hans said.

"Uh okay don't know what you said." the girl replied.

Hans took out the stabilizer and saw it was basically broke and useless. Hans shook his head.

"I don't suppose you guys have a gyro stabilizer around here?" Hans asked in English, stunning the girls.

"Wait you can speak English?" Miho asked.

"Yes I can, in fact all of can. We used the whole 'cant speak or understand English so if we're caught our interrogators, wont be so quick to squeeze information out.'' Hans said.

"Why would you be scared of interrogation? Also wouldn't it be useless since they would just get a translator" a girl asked.

"Because were are the bad of the bad, we are part of a group of sick people who like to kill indiscriminately. In short we are the SS, read the history books.'' Fritz said.

''Also yea I suppose you could say that, that's why some of us carry suicide pills." Hans said as he pulled out a small brass container that looked like lipstick.

He opened the container and dump out the pill holding it up.

"That Frauleins is hydrocyanic cyanide, can kill you in seconds." Hans said.

The group of girls were quite, after hearing that chilling lesson.


End file.
